Happy Ageism Awareness Day

October 7 is Ageism Awareness Day, and the reason I know that is simple: I’m a member of the Advisory Council on Ageism & Culture with the American Society on Aging (try saying that real fast), and we’re the folks who launched it. When it rolls around next year, we’re hoping millions of people will know. But for now, we’ll stick to that wonderful adage, start small, think big.

You can learn more about the ASA’s work on Ageism Awareness Day here, but in the meantime, I thought I’d share a few ideas on how you can respond to ageism when you see it/read it/hear it.

I subscribe to a few newsletters that highlight articles about older adults, and almost invariably, they contain ageist statements. They’ll make sweeping generalizations that conflate age with disability and illness, for example. Or they’ll include a quote from someone who says they’re “70 years young,” as if “old” is a dirty word.

One common theme is highlighting an older adult who’s doing something interesting—something that’s generally considered unusual for their age—and pouring on language that suggests it’s absolutely astounding that this person is active, thinking clearly, and making plans for the future. This is messaging that says, “Don’t get any ideas that older adults are probably more interesting than you thought. No, my dear—the stereotypes are alive and well.”

One recent article that landed in my inbox highlighted a news piece about a 99-year-old woman who had just taken her first flying lesson. In the video and the accompanying text, a reporter shared this: “Despite her age, Irene Hasserjian still feels young and full of life."

“Despite her age” is a phrase that always gets my spidey sense tingling—and the rest the sentence didn’t calm me down. So when I saw that the website included an area where I could “suggest a correction,” that’s exactly what I did. After pointing out the quote and suggesting I had a correction, here’s what I wrote:

The truth is, Irene is alive, and therefore she is full of life. She’s not partially filled with life and partially filled with death. And there’s no reason to assume that anyone who's living contains a portion of death, no matter what their age.

Using the phrase "despite her age" with this statement is an example of everyday ageism, which is defined as stereotypes (how we think) prejudices (how we feel) and discrimination (how we act) toward others or oneself based on age.

The American Society on Aging has named October 7th Ageism Awareness Day, and this is a perfect opportunity to start looking into the many ways we can all start doing a better job of understanding the truth about aging—and communicating more clearly and accurately on this topic. And here's an excellent piece in the Los Angeles Daily News about stereotyped thinking and ageism, with many links to help you learn more.

Journalists have learned not to say "accident" when they mean "crash.” And journalists have learned not to say someone died of an "apparent heart attack,” because “apparent” heart attacks don’t kill. Now it's time for journalists to learn not to say anything that suggests older adults aren't entirely alive, or that anything positive we do as older adults is done "despite" our age.

Thanks for your attention—I hope this help your journalists and your audience learn more about aging and communicate more clearly.

I haven’t heard back from the news outlet—and I doubt I will—but you never know when a little education might help.

Of course, news outlets aren’t the only place where we find ageist comments. I see them on Facebook all the time—usually age-related slights that people foist upon themselves. These comments are just as harmful as any others—activating stereotypes and potentially triggering negative thoughts, actions, and outcomes in ourselves and others—so I write back when I see self-directed ageism, too.

One string of comments I recently ran across had a list of complaints from women who felt their knees no longer looked “young” and were terribly sad about what “aging” had done to their bodies. I had to jump in …

Aging is a good thing—it means we’re continuing to live, and there’s plenty to celebrate about that. The cellular changes are actually called “senescence.” And even though the media loves to tell us that the senescence of our outer layer is a sad and embarrassing thing, and they love to call it “aging” to scare us into buying products, research tells us that having a positive attitude about aging adds years to our lives. (7 years in one study, 13 years in another.)

This one did get a bit of feedback: A dozen or so of those happy little thumbs-up and heart emojis that serve as approval and currency on Facebook, and a few comments about positive living and the gift of learning new words. So at least I know there was a little impact.

Speaking up (and writing back) when we encounter ageism can be a bit daunting at first. For me, it can be hard to find the right voice—as in “Oh look! I’ve learned something interesting on that topic that might interest you!” instead of “Hey! You’re not allowed to say that!” I’m not interested in becoming the thought police or the crank who keeps complaining. And I’m sure I sometimes miss the mark. But I do want to drop some knowledge and help raise the collective aging-IQ.

I hope you’ll join in. Once you start learning more about ageism, stereotypes, and the damage they cause, it gets easier and easier to speak up—without having to feel like a crank. And it gets easier to start celebrating this truth about aging: It means that we’re alive.

On this Ageism Awareness Day—and on every day—I hope you’ll feel comfortable finding your voice and opening up about aging. And if you’d like to share your thoughts and ideas, please reach out: margaret@GrowingAndOlder.com.